The reason for the blog name? Well, if you didn’t already know, it’s a reference from a Replacements song called, “Achin’ to Be.” (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=at4DL40FQ7Y) What compelled me to choose the name? Some of my favorite lyrics are:
“Well she’s kind of like an artist
Sittin’ on the floor
Never finishes, she abandons
Never shows a soul
She opens her mouth to speak and
What comes out’s a mystery
Thought about, not understood
She’s achin’ to be
And she’s kind of like a poet
Who finds it hard to speak
Poems come so slowly
Like the colors down a sheet
She’s achin’ to be.”
While they should stand on their own, I’ll explain…
I first heard this song during a time when I wrestled with my identity as a writer/artist/musician. There was a time, in my youth, where I created without fear and flourished in the happiness of creation. Then, the “dark ages” came. Let’s just say about a decade of self-denial and depression. Thank GOD that is over. But the return to art and music and writing and poetry was slow.
I felt a bit undeserving, like maybe it was something I never belonged to. But that kind of self-denial is crippling. I would go out occasionally, dip my toe in the creative waters, and step back into the shadows. Taking the Artist’s Way workshop really brought me out of my artist drought. It helped me with my manuscript…and something more amazing, I started writing poetry again.
I found the more I shared, the better I felt and the more I realized how much I do belong in a community of writers. I started meeting people and sharing creative energy. For the moment, I’m not “achin’ to be” unless you count achin’ to be in a band. Or achin’ to be in love. That sounds so cheesy, and I know it’ll happen someday. You can’t make these things happen. In the meantime, music will always sustain, poetry will always give me voice, and I will celebrate art in all its forms.
Shame for the dark ages. Before I could ever write, a neighbor said to Mom, “That girl is going to be a writer.” And one of my childhood friendships came to be because her dad was a poet and my seven-year-old self thought that was the coolest thing in the universe.
Don’t deny the inner calling. Has there been an artistic or musical inclination calling to you? Listen to it, even if it’s just for ten minutes. I bet you’ll find yourself achin’ for more.
Be well and rock on,